Integrating life’s hard lessons

How do you turn suffering into wisdom? How do you move forward after loss?

This has been an underlying thread this week in my conversations with clients and workshop students, and I would sum it up with this question:

How can I integrate life’s lessons so that I feel more whole and resourced?

Within this statement lies the idea that we don’t necessarily leave the hard stuff behind.

The hard stuff isn’t something that we need to fix or get rid of.

But, rather, turn into something new. 

Like how a broken bone first passes through great pain and tenderness, but through that path it is busily healing. 

The initial swelling and instability gradually transition into new strength and flexibility develops.

Yes, this takes time.

And it may never be quite the same.

Your injury becomes a part of you, an imprint on you… but not just for the worse.

Because in the process of healing you learn how to support yourself so that you can live life again as fully as possible. 

You practice patience, acceptance, being present with your emotions.

You learn more about yourself, your body, your reaction to trauma, your attachment to an able-bodied life.

You might experience the interdependence of daily life – and the deeper connection underlying it.

You might even gain insight and appreciation as to the beautiful gift of the human body – and the preciousness of time.

(Btw, my husband broke his ankle earlier this week so the reality of this metaphor is very fresh in my mind!).

So, when we think about how to integrate the difficulties of life into our being, the more we can lean into:

  • Acceptance
  • Love
  • Trust

the better you will process the experience.

Keeping in mind that you flow in and out of awareness of this. 

Some days you might feel anger or sadness. 

Other days you might feel judgy and disconnected. 

When you notice that you’re back in the pits, lovingly redirect your attention to acceptance, love and trust.

Put it into practice
Use these questions often to help you:

  • How can I allow things to be exactly as they are?
  • How would love approach this?
  • How can I lean into trust just 1% more?

One of the greatest gifts of adversity is the opportunity it gives us to know our own strength and wisdom.

Wishing you a beautiful weekend,